I’ve been thinking about goals a lot lately.

I’ve really turned my health around and am losing weight and getting into better shape. This works for me for two main reasons: one, I finally found desire (which causes motivation), and two, I learned how to set goals that work for me.

I have a big goal: my desired weight (wait for it! I’m a girl and I’m going to give you my numbers.) is 180lbs. I started at 260 (that was a lot, I know). I set a goal I can’t even imagine, though – I haven’t been under 200lbs since before high school, so I have no real concept of that in my head. Also, I’ve never lost weight before, only gained, so I have very little concept of what losing weight feels like or how it works. I’ve become an expert on weight loss, so I feel confident not only talking about it, but also in implementing what I find.

The most effective thing I’ve found is to break that huge goal into smaller chunks that are meaningful, and find an effective method of rewarding myself when I reach those goals.

For example, my first mini-goal is to get to 234lbs. I weighed 235 when I got pregnant with my son over a decade ago, and haven’t weighed less since. Reaching 234 is also around 1/4th of the way toward the bigger goal. I’m a day or two from reaching it, too! (:

My second mini-goal is 212lbs. 212 is Pace’s favorite number, and I needed a goal between my first and third, so that is perfect.

My third mini-goal is 199lbs. I haven’t weighed under 200 in my adult life, so that’s a big one!

My final goal is 180lbs. Once I reach this goal, I’ll stop focusing on weight loss. I won’t stop focusing on my health, but my focus will shift.

Another set of mini-goals involves pants. I have a couple of pairs of pants that I absolutely loved a few years ago, but then gained too much to be comfortable in them. They’re two different sizes, so one mini-goal is one pair and another is the other pair.

The point of mini-goals is to give myself easily trackable progress, to give myself something to celebrate along the journey. Having one distant goal makes it harder to reach and harder to keep in your head, even if you have a lot of desire and motivation. Having smaller goals along the way keeps you motivated and keeps your goals concrete.

• The Fundamental Equations of Motivational Alchemy

• Becoming an Expert (part one)
• Becoming an Expert (part two)
• Balancing Long-Term Goals and Short-Term Wants
  

Pace and I spent the entire day, from 11:30a til 9:30p, in hard wooden chairs at Austin Java. We’ve edited half of the book!! We were really in the zone.

We learned that having a single task in large chunks of uninterrupted time really hones your focus. We got through half of the book in one go, and even though it was a very long go, it was really awesome work and we were amazingly productive.

Late in the day, I choked up. I realized that this book will change the world, no doubt about it. It’s well-written, clear, and told in several voices so as to reach more listeners. It’s funny, whimsical, serious, smart, witty, clever, and caring. It’s fucking amazing.

We agreed that it is our ethical imperative to do everything we can to get this book to as many readers as we can; the more people we reach, the better our world will become. It is our ethical imperative to succeed wildly; anything else is shorting the world a change so many of us crave with all our being – the change of connection.

We’re bringing it on.

Today, after nearly two months of work, we finished the second draft of the Usual Error book!! I’m so incredibly happy and excited!!

On Friday, we’ll print out two copies and go to Austin Java with our laptops, our manuscripts, and a set of colored markers, and spend the entire day editing and reviewing the book. Then, we’ll send it out to all our friends and family who’ve asked to be editors and proofers! After we make any changes they recommend, we’ll hire a professional editor, fix it up, and then it’s not too long til we publish!!

I’m so proud and happy!

Also, last night we bought out the third author of the book, so now the book is entirely ours!! The entire Usual Error Project is entirely ours!!

We’re so full of glee we couldn’t stop giggling all day. What amazing progress. As Pace said, we’re really in the river, because everything is coming along perfectly!

The other night, I had a weird food experience. I ate half a bag of Doritos, most of which I consumed well after I stopped wanting them. I mulled on this for a long time, trying to figure out why the hell I’d eat so much junk, especially after I stopped wanting it.

I think I figured it out. I think it was a starvation reaction.

My system has adjusted and now expects whole, alive, nourishing sustenance. When I fed us junk devoid of nourishment, my body panicked, thinking no goodness would come of the food I was ingesting and went into overdrive, needing to consume as much as possible in an attempt to scrounge some kind of life-sustainability from the chips. This created a need to continue eating them even well after I was consciously ready to stop, because my body was afraid of starving. I didn’t get full, either, because that kind of “food” doesn’t actually get processed and turned into anything useful, so it was being shuffled out as fast as I was putting it in.

When I eat life-giving real food, I get satisfied and only eat when I want to and can stop when I want. I don’t panic and don’t wonder why I’m eating so much, because I’m not eating so much. But every time I eat foods that aren’t as nourishing, I get that feeling and end up eating far more than I wanted, and far more than I needed, and I get over-full and feel icky.

Food is so interesting and exciting!! Our bodies are so amazing and interesting!

I edited an entire section of the Usual Error book in one go today – that’s six chapters, an entire 1/5th of the book! A lot of it was hardcore revision, and I am both pleased and wiped out. I got on a roll and kept on rolling.

I am a Katamari of Editing! Roll me up, baby!

At the beginning of July, I launched into a new way of life.

At the end of June, Pace and I read a really awesome post on motivation. This got the two of us thinking and talking quite a bit, and Pace made a post about the fundamental equations of motivational alchemy and another one about the power of habits (and there’s a third one yet to come!).

I found that I am particularly drawn to soft self-discipline and hard self-discipline. I thought about what I want out of life, what I want to do to achieve those goals, and set some rules in place.

I’ve really adhered to the hard rules I set, even surpassing them. I’m really pleased and I feel like I’ve come a long way.

In July, I exercised at least five days a week (sometimes more). I missed four days in a row due to ankle weirdness, but made it every day on either side of the break – even though the break put me back in the dip. I started paying attention to what I eat, culminating in eating tiny meals every two to three hours and much healthier foods.

As a result, I’ve lost 10 pounds! More excitedly, I’ve lost 5½ inches in my waist, 1¾ inches in my upper arms, and 1 inch in my hips!!

I’ve never lost more than 5lbs. I’ve gone up and up and up, but never down. I cannot describe the joy I’m feeling!! (:

It has been hard. I’ve been sore nearly 24/7, tired a lot, and exhausted for the past couple of days. Yesterday I didn’t think I could finish my workout, but I did, and today was easier. My endurance is up, my self-esteem and confidence are up, and I’m feeling really good. I’m really happy and extremely proud of myself! Woo!

I have learned an AWESOME two-part system for easily accomplishing long-term goals.

Part one: I ask myself: “Is this more important than accomplishing my goal?”, or a more clear and personal example: “Is eating this ice cream more important to me than losing weight?”

I find the answer to almost always be, “No.”

When the answer is no, I don’t do it! I’ve given myself the power to remember my long-term goals when my short-term wants are flashing in the moment.

Part two: making my long-term goals concrete. It’s nearly impossible to strive for a goal that’s vague and distant, especially in the face of a real and present short-term want, but making my long-term goals specific makes them not only more attainable, but more real in the moment. It’s in the moment that I have trouble choosing long-term over short-term, and this has made it not only possible, but easy!

So what do I do if I ever answer “yes”? It happens – I’ve found that occasionally the answer to “is eating this ice cream right now more important than losing weight” is yes; ice cream is my #1 comfort food, and like everyone, I need comfort sometimes.

I solved this by finding very low-fat frozen yogurt: I can eat an entire pint and take in less calories than a candy bar, and actually I can no longer physically consume an entire pint. I usually eat about 1/4th of one at a time, which I find to be totally acceptable, and it fills that comfort need that invokes the feelings in the first place.

Another example is that sometimes I really want a break from exercising. Again, I’ll consider if a break is more important than my goals, and if the answer is yes (this is extremely rare, but it does happen), I’ll go for a walk or a swim or something that day instead of the more hardcore exercising I usually do.

So, my method of dealing with these rare yeses is to find things that don’t do as much harm but still feed whatever need is presenting itself.

These combinations are incredibly powerful. This has helped me make real and measurable progress on goals I never believed I could accomplish. I’m really excited and happy!!

I baked a cake! (The Boy helped!)

It was super-yummy!

This is the first thing I’ve ever made from scratch that didn’t turn out icky in some way. I’m extraordinarily proud of myself!!

I’ve been overcoming externally inflicted limitations a lot recently, and this was a BIG one. I’m really proud and pleased and excited to be constantly proving to myself that the only thing that limits me is me.

*dances* I can cook, I can bake, I can spell, I can do math, I can sing, I can chill, I can be happy, I can do whatever I want. I rock!

I met a woman named Valerie Wynn at a party last night, and we were
talking about business. (She’s started and sold 3 businesses in
the past dozen years, and is now on her 4th.) I asked her what advice
she would give to a new business owner, and she said:

1. Set reasonable goals
2. Pay yourself first
3. Incorporate as a C-Corp

As for #1, we plan to set unreasonable goals, so that’s out. But
if she means achievable goals, then that’s cool.

As for #2, I read about that in Rich Dad Poor Dad. I think
it’s a very important concept. Most people pay themselves last.
They have bills and expenses and discretionary income, and whatever’s
left over goes to them. If you’re a small business owner, especially
a hobby-turned-business owner, often your business is funded by
whatever’s left over after every other piece of the pie has been
sliced out. This is insane. If your business is really
important to you, pay yourself first. Set aside the amount of money
you need for your business, and only then pay the things that are
lower priority.

As for #3, I haven’t had a chance to research all the options yet,
but we’ll be setting up The Usual Error as an official business soon,
so I’ll post about it again once I’ve done my homework. (: [link]